Well, there is no morning commute to write about today because its Friday and it's the best day of the week. Before I go on any further I need to say Happy Birthday to the best guy in my life. He is so awesome and is such a great person - and he's lucky enough to be my dad! So Happy Birthday Dad! I love you!
Speaking of dad's, let me next say in advance that this blog is best described as an outlet for my rants - so please be forgiving about any grammatical or spelling mistakes that are made. I ask this because yesterday, in the afterglow of my first blog post, my dad emailed me and said this:
Hi, I'm running on empty and out of time to talk too long but I loved your rant. However, and I hate to do this because I can just see you rolling your eyes back and goinng, DAAAAAAAAAAAAAD! but you have to proofread your work. You can type like lightning but you have to spell check and read it back. Years from now when the commie libs try to find some terrible writings of yours from the past, you won't want them to say that you couldn't spell or use the right word as well as being a right wing nut job. I thought it was great, but give it another 90 seconds.
So in case you were wondering where my dry sense of humor comes from - it is this man. Please note spelling error. love u dad.
Moving right along. It's 745 am and I'm sitting looking out the window and drinking my coffee- very Carrie Bradshaw of me. I've been concerned about the rain lately and can't help but wonder if it is becoming apocalyptic. There have literally been people boating up and down their streets - oh well, we will see. Speaking of apocalypse, I am extremely fond of this website because it is the most awesome thing ever. I mention it because a few weeks ago there was a post about some EvilFish (it's name) that supposedly lives miles and miles under the sea that had surfaced in Japan. This fish was honest to God at least 20 feet long. Apparently the few times in history that this fish has surfaced, it has been just before some catastrophic event - like the Tsunami a few years back. This worries me because one of the best people in my life - we can call her Mrs.XXX lives in Japan. I worry about her alot because some of the most outrageous things i see on the Internet come from some freaks in Japan - case in point, the Japanese recently invented a video game that allows you to simulate raping a woman, impregnating her, and then talking her into getting an abortion - classy.
There is not too much else to report. As most of you know graduation is upon us in just a few short weeks and it is about time. I am, however, surprised at what an arduous process this has become. There is a laundry list of things you have to do before school will release from its clenched talons, but there is no one there to help you or remind you to do these things. Not that I am a deadbeat, but how will I know to have someone measure my head for my cap unless Frack - my lovely coworker- mentioned it to me? I would have been walking across stage with a teacup sized hat, or worse yet, one that fell over my eyes making me slip and causing a scene - excellent.
Now on to Frack. She deserves a special mention today because she is one of the few people in that office that have kept me sane this semester. She was the first one to celebrate (a teary, smiley, cheer fest in the office) with me when my divorce was finalized, which is ironic because she is getting ready to march down the aisle herself, but her main squeeze seems like a great guy :) You may wonder why I call her Frack but funnily (a word?) enough, because we are constant companions, our supervisor has deemed us Frick and Frack - so heres to you Frack :) I love this woman because of special convo we recently had about T riders - both babies and Asians. I will let you all in on it soon...
There are some awesome people at work - all who will be starring roles in this blog - with clever nicknames of course!
Well, I need to get ready to drive Mr. Big (my love) to the T. But just a quick glimmer into my morning, he is standing next to me in the bathroom doorway, naked as a jaybird brushing his teeth, while petting Julius - our cat, who is standing on the toilet - all while wearing one of the new Bump Its that I just bought. I love this man with all my heart but he is crazy. And now Julius is laying on the toilet - if only he would pee in there - oops never mind, Big just put him down and goes "Hahaha (in his best Nelson voice) I stole your seat"...yikes.
Well, I'm off - have an excellent day and PLEASE be careful of the freaks...especially the one in my bathroom.
-Frick
Friday, April 16, 2010
Thursday, April 15, 2010
The Morning Commute
After living in Beantown just shy of three years, I have become quite accustomed to the everyday annoyances of the "morning commute." Each day I wake up in anticipation of swift, easy train ride to work, with minimal interference from the riders. Eachd ay I am more dissapointed than the last. After parking my car in the overpriced gaarage, I walk to the train, am rudely shoved by some troll who is in hurry to get up to the platform and wait an obscene about of time for the train to arrive.
Then there is the dreaded escalator - the rule is simple, walk left, stand right, and if you have kids get them the F out of the way - and if you have an SUV for a stroller - USE THE ELEVATOR. Why do people not understnad this. There is barely room for two people to stand side by side on this thing and Suzy Stay at Home has the latest and greatest Eddie Bauer Expedition stroller for her child who is clearly old enough to have a part time job by now.
Once I finally see that train pulling in, there is a little bit of anxiety while waiting to see just how crowded today's ride will be. Everyone racing to the nearest door to push their way on to get a coveted metal seat with with 1980's velour covering. NOTE: gettin on the T is the worst part of my day. Again, the concept is simple - doors open -> get on. Doors closed -> you can no longer get on. On more than one occasion I have seen people do absolutely outrageous things to get on. Once a girl, who looked normal enough, broke into a full sprint, knocking people out of her way, put her harm in the door and literally ripping the train doors open, all while clenching her teeth in an atrocious fashion. She then gets on successfully and screams "YES!" at the top of her lungs. Was this necessary?
Once I (usually) successfully make it in the train - there is, without fail, someone on a mission from God who will ruin this ride. Whet er is be the person SCREAMING in a generic Asian dialect into their cell phone, most often hanging up and speaking to their neighbor in seamless English, or some unfit mother who is allowing their child to scream uncontrollably or climb all over passengers who are still half asleep, or some inconsiderate bastard that decides that is so important that he could not possibly take up less than three seats. Two weeks ago, I encountered and alleged human being (I say alleged because there are some of you walking around that are just so unbelievable, it is hard to imagine that we share the same genetic code,) who - at peak rush hour - decided that he would take up four seats. Two with is tattered bags which must have contained all his worldly possessions and two with his body - which was small for a man, all while having his entire face wrapped in a black scar from chin to forehead. I thought this train was going to be on the evening news and we were all going to go up in flames. What was worse about this scene was that everyone was terrified of this guy. Women clutching their handbags, looking nervously around, men backing away giving him some space - as though they were dealing with a hostage situation.
People I ask you is this the best that Mass Transit can be? Really??
More to come about that wonderful little miracle known as a "switch problem" which I am certain is a made up situation, only to allow the MBTA workers to shirk ALL responsibility - not that they couldn't carry any less as it is.
Then there is the dreaded escalator - the rule is simple, walk left, stand right, and if you have kids get them the F out of the way - and if you have an SUV for a stroller - USE THE ELEVATOR. Why do people not understnad this. There is barely room for two people to stand side by side on this thing and Suzy Stay at Home has the latest and greatest Eddie Bauer Expedition stroller for her child who is clearly old enough to have a part time job by now.
Once I finally see that train pulling in, there is a little bit of anxiety while waiting to see just how crowded today's ride will be. Everyone racing to the nearest door to push their way on to get a coveted metal seat with with 1980's velour covering. NOTE: gettin on the T is the worst part of my day. Again, the concept is simple - doors open -> get on. Doors closed -> you can no longer get on. On more than one occasion I have seen people do absolutely outrageous things to get on. Once a girl, who looked normal enough, broke into a full sprint, knocking people out of her way, put her harm in the door and literally ripping the train doors open, all while clenching her teeth in an atrocious fashion. She then gets on successfully and screams "YES!" at the top of her lungs. Was this necessary?
Once I (usually) successfully make it in the train - there is, without fail, someone on a mission from God who will ruin this ride. Whet er is be the person SCREAMING in a generic Asian dialect into their cell phone, most often hanging up and speaking to their neighbor in seamless English, or some unfit mother who is allowing their child to scream uncontrollably or climb all over passengers who are still half asleep, or some inconsiderate bastard that decides that is so important that he could not possibly take up less than three seats. Two weeks ago, I encountered and alleged human being (I say alleged because there are some of you walking around that are just so unbelievable, it is hard to imagine that we share the same genetic code,) who - at peak rush hour - decided that he would take up four seats. Two with is tattered bags which must have contained all his worldly possessions and two with his body - which was small for a man, all while having his entire face wrapped in a black scar from chin to forehead. I thought this train was going to be on the evening news and we were all going to go up in flames. What was worse about this scene was that everyone was terrified of this guy. Women clutching their handbags, looking nervously around, men backing away giving him some space - as though they were dealing with a hostage situation.
People I ask you is this the best that Mass Transit can be? Really??
More to come about that wonderful little miracle known as a "switch problem" which I am certain is a made up situation, only to allow the MBTA workers to shirk ALL responsibility - not that they couldn't carry any less as it is.
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